Challenging Behaviour and Autism

We have been having  a challenging time recently with Johnathan.  Kevin came up with 3 things that Johnathan needs to do to be good.  And quite honestly I was surprised at it, but very thankful.

Basically, Johnathan needs to listen to what is said to him, accept the answers he is given. and make good choices.  And he has been struggling with it.  He has been challenging almost everything we say to him and that really doesn’t help make life any easier. for us.

He has been struggling with accepting answers he is given .  For example, he wanted me to play some game or other and I said No. thank you.  You know Mummy doesn’t do fighting.”  Then he kept asking me to give him a reason why I wouldn’t do it and I started to get really annoyed.

But the other thing he would answer is repeating what he wants and adding “I’m just saying” which actually is NOT just saying -  he is not accepting the answers he is given or making good choices!  

So this is what we’re working on with him.  Everything is also being pushed as far as he can.  Like he KNOWS he watches 3 videos OR 30 minutes long of video.  So he pushes for more videos, or if he is playing a game with someone and is told five more minutes, he tries to ask for  more time.

Personally I find it hard to understand how and why he does it.  However, I have discovered he ‘isn’t coping with school again.  The difficulty for the teachers is that he doesn’t tell them when he is having problems.  They have a card they fill in, with different emotion words on it.  Remember reading about black and white thinking that is very common with people on the spectrum?  Well, because at that VERY SECOND he feels fine, he puts fine.

I have tried to explain to him that they are asking for the average of how they have been feeling since the time before, not in the second he does it.  So the deputy head told me that most of his time he marks it as though he is feeling fine.  And also, the emotions description doesn’t give EVERY emotion in the world, but one word that wraps up a whole host of emotions and he needs to recognise that and use the word that is closer to how he has been feeling.

All the stress that he’s been under at school has clearly had an impact on his behaviour at home and we need to help him calm down and that is what will be happening over the next few weeks.