Head banging and autism

I have spoken about how autism can bring terrible rage and frustration in meltdowns.  Accompanying that can be head banging.  You see, they have to express it some way.  And if they have no speech, or ways to say it, the need for expression is still there.

And you have heard me say that when meltdowns occur you need to keep the person melting down and everyone in the vicinity safe. Because when a meltdown has commenced, the person is not in control of themselves.

I remember some years ago I will never forget the time I had calmed Johnathan down by lying next to him with my arm over his back and just lay there next to him, singing gently in his ear.  As the song began to work, I could see him fall asleep.  I got up off the floor and said to his Grandparents “and that is how I deal with his meltdowns” and they were both jaws dropped, looking at me.

When Johnathan woke up, he said to me that there were times he just couldn’t stop whatever was happening to him and sometimes he chose to be angry.  I said to him that I perfectly understood because I did.  I knew he wasn’t having a temper tantrum as his grandparents thought.  Meltdowns ARE different and it’s good to recognise the difference between them so that you can support your child well.

I must admit there are other conditions that also have head banging so this on its own is not enough to give a diagnosis of autism spectrum.   But on the other hand, I believe that when someone on the spectrum gets angry at themselves or the situation they find themselves, they can start to bang their heads as an expression of their anger and/or frustration.

When Johnathan was really young – well, he must have been just over 15 months old, he had loads of meltdowns and started to bang his head on the furniture or floor or whatever was near. There was no signs that I could see that would tell me he was going to do it.

My philosophy was that if he was doing it now and he discovered what was hard and what was soft, he would soon go to one place and bang his head there. And I was proved right.  He doesn’t like pain and so the bed is the most comfortable place to bang your head.