Frustration and autism

I don’t know how much you know about frustration levels and autism, but it can be the thing that leads to a meltdown.  And I prefer to keep Johnathan from meltdowns because they are exhausting for him and for me and anyone else in sight.  Of course there are times a meltdown happens because things are out of control and the child doesn’t know what to do, so they have a meltdown.

When Johnathan was younger, frustration for him was INSTANT.  Literally a toy wouldn’t do what he wanted, or the book page wouldn’t turn over, or the line of whatever was crooked, or whatever it was wouldn’t stay flush or flat and that would be instant absolute complete meltdown.

Of course we realised that his meltdowns were exacerbated by frustration.  So I took away the things that frustrated him instantly.  I mean, what’s the point of buying a Scalectrix if the thing doesn;t work, the moment you set it up again on Christmas Day?  Kevin and I had tried it out to check it was working and it was, so we packed it away thinking everything was ok.  The cars wouldn’t go round the track and were prone to fall off if they were given any help to get them started at least.

It was one of the most annoying presents we ever got for Johnathan and I regretted it the moment we got it all out and ready to go and nothing happened.  We had checked the toy worked previously to AVOID things like this happening.  His grandparents had also got him one for their home at Christmas and it had to be carefully put together and even more carefully played with  Frustration with a toy on Christmas Day is NOT what you want!!  That’s why we tested it before giving it to him and it still didn’t work.

Frustration with anything for them is so instantaneous.  One of the things we have been working with is when Johnathan DOES get frustrated, he doesn’t start spamming a button or hitting or throwing things.  But one of the difficulties is that he is so compartmentalised in his brain, he will stop with one thing and not another.

One of the things Johnathan wants to do is learn how to play the violin.  Now that’s a good ambition and I think something he should try  I loved music as a child although I knew I didn’t really have the skill of rhythm.  Well, I don’t know how you’d say it.  I can sing, I can hear a tune, I can repeat it and I KNOW the rhythm but I cannot reproduce the rhythm myself or move my body or clap in time unless I am following someone else.

We said to Johnathan he has show that he can control himself a bit more to be able to get the violin.  But frustration can easily and quickly rise and to prevent breakage of potentially expensive items.  Learning how to try and help them stop getting frustrated is something that I find myself doing without thinking, as I believe other parents do.