Nostalgia

Have you ever sat and thought about nostalgia and what it means to you?  You know, the good, fun times.  The times when you were happy.  Things that take you to that time….Sight, sound, smell, taste - all your senses that return you to that state in your mind.

Last night we were getting settled down for bed and I was chattering away (as I do because that is generally the best time I can get Kevin to focus on me and I am saying before he puts the mask for his sleep apnea on.  Nobody to disturb us (unless the animals want something).

But I started to talk about negative things from my past and Kevin stopped me.  He said that I shouldn’t talk of bad memories, but some good ones.  I asked him what he could tell me to think about as my mind went blank.  He couldn’t think of anything, but I suddenly thought of our wedding day.  I had white roses in my bouquet, we had a lot of photos taken at the rose bushes in the park next to the church.  Some people brought roses to Natalie’s funeral.  And Johnathan loved me singing a song to him with roses in it.  Maisie loves the rose bush park in Renfrew.  Basically roses have been a part of my life since we married.

And yes, nostalgia when you think of something and it reminds you of good times, that’s where it should be.  Wonderful memories that bring love, joy and peace back to you.  Bad memories are just that.  Bad memories that can bring nightmares.

But you know what?  You could think about all the negative things that have happened to you and get sad and miserable or focus on the good things and the feelings they brought to you.  If I hadn’t had the therapy I have been going through I wouldn’t have been able to even think of anything positive in my life.

Sometimes I think we just need to remind ourselves of the good times.  And they WERE good,so why not? But I will admit I was in a place where that wasn’t even possible.  Nothing was good even if it was. I guess it shows you how far I have come in 15 sessions.  My counsellor was telling me last night that I have come a long way in that time and now I had it proved to me.  How great isthat?

If you want to be nostalgic (and absolutely why not?) then think and talk about the good things, even if they bring a smile to your face with a tear in your eye.